The Secret Sharer: Alternate
by Alice Bekett
Summary: "Gaius has proved himself time and again, only to be questioned again when more things happen. How he has stayed here, where his desire to help people only got him enemies, I don't know," Merlin was clearly holding back tears, but just barely, "He's almost burnt at the stake, and now he's almost been tortured to death, and you don't even have the decency to apologize."
1. Chapter 1

The Secret Sharer- Alternate

"I've had my heart broken enough today. I cannot stand to lose another friend," Arthur snapped.

Merlin grit his teeth, fighting back tears. Images of Agravaine leaving Morgana's hut played in his mind's eye. He stared at Arthur, "You already have," his voice was strained, and wavered, "Because Agravaine is your uncle, you refuse to see what he is!"

"Merlin, that is enough!" Arthur stood up from the table.

"No it's not, Arthur. I know he's your uncle, but you cannot remain blind to this forever! Gaius would not run away, let alone without saying goodbye to me first!" Merlin stood away from the stone column he had been using to support himself.

"Merlin, I know you trust Gaius, and I did too, but you can't deny the evidence-"

"What evidence?" Merlin spat, rising to his full height, and staring down at the King of Camelot, "Every piece of evidence has been provided to you by Agravaine!"

"MERLIN!" Arthur bellowed, face red, "That is enough! You are relieved of your post, effective immediately!"

Merlin clenched his hands into fists, "Fine. You'll see, Arthur. Gaius was abducted. You better hope he's not dead!" Merlin spun around on his heel, storming out of the room.

Arthur stared after his now ex-manservant, his blood boiling in his veins. How dare Merlin accuse Agravaine of treason, it was inexcusable. Arthur growled, and began to pace, then looked at his guards, "Go find me a new manservant!"

(LINE BREAK)

Merlin sat at Gaius's bedside, watching the man he viewed as a father, breathe. Nearly everyone had been by to wish the old physician well, except for Arthur and Agravaine. Merlin swallowed, resting his head in his hands. What if Arthur hated him for what he said? What if Merlin was banished from Camelot?

A movement from the man on the bed made Merlin look up. Gaius's eyes were open, and alert. Merlin couldn't help but smile, "Gaius!"

"I'm sorry, Merlin..." Gaius whispered, "I told your secret, the one I thought I would keep until my death. Morgana knows..."

"No she doesn't, Gaius. Alator chose who he supported. Morgana knows nothing."

Gaius smiled sadly, "One day, I fear, I will disappoint you."

Merlin's smile faded, and a dark shadow passed over his features, "I did something bad, Gaius-"

_Knock-knock-knock._

Merlin looked up as the King of Camelot himself slowly entered the room, "Gaius. It's good to have you back."

Gaius nodded, "I feared the worst, Sire."

"So did we. We thought you were the traitor. I'm glad I was mistaken."

Merlin's face clouded over, but he bit his tongue. Gaius looked taken-aback as well, "Arthur, I've known you your entire life. You should know that I love you too much to ever betray you."

"That is what Merlin told me," Arthur's voice was clear, "And I am sorry. Anything that was broken during the searching of your chambers shall be replaced, you need only to tell me."

"I'll let you know, Sire," Gaius replied.

Arthur noticed that the old man looked disappointed. Arthur cleared his throat, "Merlin, I need you to leave."

Merlin growled something under his breath, but stood, and left the physician's chambers. Arthur moved to sit beside Gaius as Merlin exited the room.

Merlin sat on the hard, stone steps that led to his home. He sighed, laying his head against the stone wall. _What have I done?_

Several minutes passed, then Arthur stepped out of the room, and stood next to Merlin's sitting form, "He's asleep again."

"Good, he needs his rest."

"I'm sorry, Merlin, for not believing you. Gaius could not tell me who abducted him. I still am not convinced that Agravaine is a traitor."

Merlin grit his teeth. _Of course Gaius won't say, we have no proof_, "Of course, sire."

"You're not fired anymore."

"I'm not leaving Gaius alone. I don't want anyone else accusing him of anything else while he recovers."

"That's not going to happen again-"

"That's what Uther said after the Witchfinder, Arthur! Gaius has served Camelot faithfully for longer than the both of us have been alive. You could say he was a close friend of Uther, and a good friend of you. But both of you turned on him the second there was a shadow of doubt!" Merlin stood, shaking with rage, "You are no better than your father. I don't know why I ever believed you could be a great person. You may be a good ruler, Arthur, but you cannot stand by your friends when they need you the most."

"Merlin!" Arthur exclaimed, in shock.

"Gaius has proved himself time and again, only to be questioned again when more things happen. How he has stayed here, where his desire to help people only got him enemies, I don't know," Merlin was clearly holding back tears, but just barely, "He's almost burnt at the stake, and now he's almost been tortured to death, and you don't even have the decency to apologize. Arthur Pendragon, I hope you learn from this, because if you don't, the group of people protecting you will stop believing. If they stop believing, you will die."

Arthur was shocked into silence, and watched numbly as Merlin swiftly walked back into the rooms he shared with Gaius. Before he disappeared into the chambers, he stopped, and turned back.

"I'll start again tomorrow, if Gaius is better."

The door slammed shut, leaving a bewildered King in its wake.

(LINE BREAK)

I wrote this a few days ago, rather late at night. So, if you find any mistakes, I would greatly appreciate it if you tell me. Anyhoo, I watched the episode, "The Secret Sharer", and I really wanted Merlin to stand up for once.

I don't own Merlin.

Please review me or PM comments/questions/suggestions.


	2. Chapter 2

Episode: Lamia

At the End

Merlin stared down at the neck of his horse. Everything hurt, including his pride and emotions. Arthur rode on ahead, not even looking back to check on his notoriously clumsy servant.

The knights rode well behind the servant, chattering amongst themselves quietly. Gwen rode beside her brother, face pale with worry. Gaius was the only one brave enough to ride beside the battered servant, eyebrow arched in its characteristic way.

Merlin refused to talk to anyone, and jumped when a sudden noise or movement broke the silence, especially when it concerned the knights. Soon, night fell, and the large group found a place to camp, a clearing that was big enough to fit everyone and the horses, and was surrounded by trees to help keep them sheltered from any wind that might blow during the night.

Merlin slipped off his horse, wincing as his feet touched the ground. He leaned against his horse for a moment, grimacing in pain. No one but Gaius moved to help him. Gaius fussed over the young man, taking the horse from him, and commanding him to rest against a nearby tree.

After several minutes of fruitless arguing, the servant finally consented. He carefully spread out his bedroll, and leaned against the tree, keeping an eye on all that was going on.

It was Leon who approached him first, "Merlin-"

"Stay back," Merlin croaked, his voice hoarse.

Leon stared at the servant, who had drawn in on himself at Leon's approach. Leon licked his lips, "Merlin, we were under her spell-"

"I know that, Leon," Merlin snapped. He raised his head to look the knight in the eye, revealing his bruised features, "and right now, I don't care."

"Merlin, we're all sor-"

Merlin growled, "No... Don't tell me that. I know that, but I can't right now."

Gaius sighed, walking over. He looked at Leon, and shook his head, "Not now."

"But-"

"Not. Now."

Leon sighed, and rejoined the group of disheartened knights. Merlin glared after them, dong a rather effective job considering one eye was almost swollen shut. Gaius hovered near his ward, not speaking a word, but pulling out his medical kit.

Merlin shook his head, "No, Gaius-"

"I didn't treat you there because of how terrified you were. I need to treat them now to stop infection from setting in."

Merlin stared at the old man, before sighing, "Fine."

"I'll get the eye first, then I'll see about what I can do for everything else."

Merlin nodded, "It would be easier if I could use magic," he whispered, keeping his voice low.

Gaius shot him an exasperated look, shooting him the infamous Eyebrow of Doom. Merlin couldn't help but smile at the name whenever someone mentioned it, and even in his current state, it still made his lip twitch. Gaius looked directly into the young warlock's eyes, "That would be too suspicious, Merlin."

"I know."

Merlin shut his swollen eye the rest of the way, as Gaius began to apply a cooling balm that would reduce the swelling, and pain. Merlin sighed in relief, leaning into the careful touch of his father figure.

When Gaius finished, he looked closer at the eye, "It looks better already."

"It feels better, too."

"Remove your shirt. I know you've at least bruised your ribs, but I need to check if you've broken any."

"I didn't-"

"I know, Merlin. It's not your fault. I still need to check, anyway."

Merlin, wincing, untied his neckerchief, and carefully removed the dirty shirt he was wearing. Gaius had to stop himself from cursing the group of knights with his magic, even though he knew they had been under an enchantment.

Merlin's thin, scarred torso was covered in bruises. Some purple, but most were black. Merlin stared at his heavily bruised torso, wincing, "What are the chances that I _haven't _broken a rib?"

"Not very high," Gaius replied, gently pressing his fingers along the bruising.

Merlin winced, gritting his teeth, and clenching his eyes shut to stop the tears that were threatening to spill. Merlin couldn't hold back the hiss of agony that escaped him when Gaius pushed into the middle of the bruising; directly over his ribs.

"There's one broken, or at least cracked. It hasn't shifted position, but judging by your reaction, it's worse than the others. Sorry, Merlin, but I need to continue checking."

Merlin nodded, biting his lip. Gaius continued, and found another broken rib on the other side, far more then just cracked. In fact, Gaius was amazed he hadn't seen it earlier: it was jutting out of place.

"Put it back in," Merlin whispered, grabbing onto a nearby stick to clutch in between his teeth.

"I need someone to hold you down. Who do you want?"

"Arthur," Merlin managed around the stick.

Gaius rolled his eyes, he pulled a leather strap out of his bag, and replaced the stick with the strap, "Sire!"

Arthur strode over, eyes wide with realization, "Merlin-"

"You can talk later, I need you to hold him down at the shoulders. This is going to hurt, and I don't need him thrashing."

"Of course," Arthur bent down, and pushed down on the thin shoulders of his friend.

His eyes roamed the body, for he had never seen Merlin shirtless before. He always wore a tunic, and his neckerchief. Through the bruising, Arthur could see a large burn mark on the front of his servant's chest, shiny and faded with age. Several other scars seemed to jump off the skin, but because of the bruising, Arthur couldn't begin to guess what had caused them.

Gaius looked at the two young men, "On my signal. One, two, three-" With that, the court physician pushed down on the rib, moving it back into place with a _crack._

Merlin screamed around the leather strap, jerking away from Gaius's careful fingers. Arthur held him down, until Merlin calmed down. Merlin seemed barely conscious, but still spat out the chewed leather strap, " Th'nks."

"I know, Merlin. It will hurt, but hopefully it should heal straight."

Merlin made a non-committal noise, his eyes beginning to drift shut. Arthur leaned on his heels, looking to Gaius, "Is he going to be okay?"

"In time, he will be," Gaius replied, standing on legs that were beginning to creak from kneeling in place for too long. He carefully drew the young man's blanket over the sleeping form.

"What happened?" Arthur asked, "Why wasn't Merlin affected?"

"I don't know, Sire."

"I know why it didn't effect Gwen: she's a woman. But, it should have affected Merlin."

Gaius sighed, "There is a great deal about Merlin that you do not know about, Sire."

Arthur blinked, "He can't be. He's my manservant."

"That means nothing, Arthur. You remember Ealdor?"

"The village where Merlin grew up? Of course."

"He never had a father. He was also an odd boy. The only people who could stand him for very long were his mother, and his friend Will."

Arthur felt a little guilty, remembering what he had told Merlin on the day of his best friend's death.

Gaius continued, "The children there were cruel. Even some of the adults were cruel to him. It wasn't his fault, but no one would accept him. Hunith asked me to take him in to save him. He has found friends in Camelot, Arthur."

"I know."

'This has hurt him, Arthur, in many ways. Gwen tried to stop it at first, but didn't stick up for him like he did for her. The knights, his friends, beat him to a pulp, and you and I were too late to stop it."

"None of this explains why he wasn't effected," Arthur's eyes suddenly went wide, "Gwen wasn't effected because she is a woman, and likes men..."

Gaius sighed, "I know what you are thinking, Sire. And that is not it, Merlin has loved women before."

"Like who?"

"I believe he had a crush on Morgana, before. I thought he would develop feelings for Gwen, but he never did," Gaius paused, "There was another girl, some time ago. She... died a short time after they met."

Arthur stared at the unconscious form of his friend, "He's one of the people who've been protecting me, isn't he?"

Gaius looked up at the king, in an odd mixture of alarm and pleasure, "What makes you say that, Sire?"

"The scars...and how he's away at the tavern whenever something bad happens. I've checked, Gaius, he's very rarely at the tavern."

Gaius's lips twitched, "Merlin needs to clean out my leech tanks for a week now."

Arthur's eyes widened, "Why?"

"We made a bet, nothing harsh or improper. Merlin bet you would never figure it out, I bet otherwise."

"Does he really think I'm that clueless?" Arthur exclaimed, crossing his arms over his chest.

Gaius gave Arthur a severe look, "It's worked until now, hasn't it?"

Arthur's cheeks darkened in anger, but he dipped his head, "I suppose it has."

"Do you know how he's helping you?" Gaius asked after a long pause.

"Erm...no. Should I?"

Gaius relaxed visibly, "No, Sire. I would appreciate it if you don't try to figure it out, either. Merlin will tell you in his own time," Gaius turned back to Merlin, "You may want to talk to the knights and Gwen, calm them down."

"Good idea. Thank you, Gaius."

Gaius didn't reply, leaving a heavy, awkward silence clinging to the air. Arthur moved away, and began to mentally prepare for his chat with the others.

(LINE BREAK)

I'm not entirely certain where this came from. I honestly wasn't going to update this again, but this plot bunny made me write it.

I have no idea what I'm doing with this story, or even if I'm going to update it again. If anyone has any ideas, suggestions, comments, and questions, let me know in a review or a private message.

I'm sorry to say I still don't own Merlin.


End file.
